I recall a public information poster backstage at the Royal Festival Hall around 1980. Heading a map of central London, showing areas at risk of flooding, was the stern warning

What would YOU do if London flooded tomorrow?

In that selfless spirit of social involvement that makes musicians’ life so enriching, someone soon added a reply:

BREASTSTROKE

Another seasoned free-lancing wag added, in an incisive piece of reflexive ethnographic commentary:

ACCEPT A DATE IN THE NORTH OF ENGLAND